Another quickie...

...come on you guys, you know what I mean!

Anyway, I'm just about to go out with Sim. We're going to go get some coffee. Yeah.

On another, and perhaps more sober note, I bought my plane ticket back to the States yesterday. I bought it and then was struck by panic, wondering if I'd done the right thing, but hey, it's done now, and don't worry, I don't really regret it. The date of departure is December 5. How scary is that. Anyway, more on that perhaps later.

(It's very difficult to write a blog post when you've got someone looking over your shoulder reading what you're writing. Forgive me, not my shoulder, more kind of off to the corner.)

Anyway, gotta go get that coffee. Love you all.

Just a reminder that I'm still alive

Just in case you all thought I'd disappeared off the face of the earth, well, I haven't. Actually, for some reason, Safari keeps quitting everytime I sign into blogger, so I'm using someone else's computer. Anyway, everything is fine and blah blah blah. That's it.

Weeelll

I am dowloading an ebook and stuffing my face with Cadbury's chocolate! MWAHAHAHA!

And, my mom sent me mac and cheese and hot chocolate! MWAHAHAHAH!

And a WVU hat! MWAHAHAHA!

And I'm wearing it! MWAHAHAHA!

And last night I had surprise cheesecake with six candles on it! MWAHAHAHA!

And I had a surprise party that truly was a surprise! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Go Google - free the books, they want to be free! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Happy Birthday to me!

This is going to be quick, but today I turned 21. Just thought you'd like to know that.

Miserable

I'm cold and there's the beginnings of a hole in my favorite sweatshirt and my parents have to get rid of the kitty. How sad is that?

On a happier note, tomorrow is my birthday and the Giles get back. Yay.

Of course, that means I have to talk to Andrew about my plans and I don't know if I'm particularly excited about that. I have now been here three weeks, although it feels like 3 months. It really does. Oh well.

Janelle and me being strange

Janelle and me being strange, originally uploaded by Boj.

I couldn't help but post this, even though it's from a few weeks ago. Hehehe.

All alone

That is what I am this evening. Belen has gone to Drogheda, or however you spell it, Moly has taken her, Sim isn't staying at he chalet right now, the Giles are gone. It's just me and my computer. So, I stages a heist on Moly's tea stash and ordered a couple of ebooks. Argh.

I mean, I know all about finding a hobby or whatever, but honestly, I don't like living in seclusion. I mean, Nora said she was going to come up and I assumed Simeon was here and blah blah blah. But alas, I am all along.

So cold, all alone.

Sandra Wilson came up to me today

It really was quite amazing. We just got to talking there in the middle of the road. She was telling me all about how she and her husband Horace had been praying for me. Then she told me all about how she and Horace got together, about her first marriage, and how he was a gift from God to her, although it took her years to see that. But she said a lot of good things. God gives you desires and dreams, and not just so he can see if you will give them up, but because he actually has something in them for you. How if you thank God for where you are and what you're experiencing, even if you don't feel like it, it will be worth it. I guess why it meant so much to me is that I've been trying to pray about whether I should leave come December. In all honesty, however, I haven't really wanted to know what God wants - I just want to do what I want to do. So I've been praying - God, I don't really want what you want, but I want you to know that and know that I know that's not really right. I don't know, but I see it as a sign for something. I don't necessarily know what, but there you have it.

Well, I really should do something with this time I have to do some stuff like electronics.

Are you ready for this one?

Okay, this is my new revelation for today:

I think I would like to have a boyfriend. I know, I know, I've said it before, but heck, I'm just in one of those moods. Too bad there are next to no options here for me. Well, maybe sometime, someday. I mean, I always seem to half-like these guys that I either don't know that well so I end up feeling really awkward around them, or else they're not very smart and can't enjoy an even halfway intelligent conversation. It's dumb. Anyway, someday my prince will come... tra la la.

I was playing my violin in church this morning and Michael Bailey decided I needed my own mic, which really irritated me because he comes up and shoves it right in front of me. The stupid thing was that I wasn't playing very loudly for a reason. No, I tell a lie, two reasons. For one, I didn't know the stupid song (and yes, it was a stupid song) and on top of that, Claire and Nora decided to play in E! Why E? I hate playing in E. Oh well. It's fine, because I figure, if the recording is terrible, it's Michael's fault, not mine.

I'm really delaying going to pick spinach for a salad tonight. I'd just rather curl up on my bed and read. Oops, forgot, I've finished all the interesting books I have. This is what I read this week - Ender's Shadow, Shadow Puppets, The Plain Truth, Another View, and something else that I can't remember. I just go through them too quickly. And nobody interesting is online right now. Oh well. Guess that means I have to go pick spinach.

Oh, by the way, I'm knitting a scarf. It's the ugliest thing you ever did see, but it's fine, it's still a recognizable scarf. Just the colors and the yarn are kind of nasty. It's really just for practice. That's my exciting thing for today.

Since it's been a while

I'm feeling pretty good right now. I've been playing Mozart's Turkish Rondo and I've finally figured out some stupid little grace notes that were driving me crazy. That made me happy. On the other hand, my violin playing was uninspired today. Ah well, it happens. Anyway, today has been a very relaxed day, so it's very nice. Tonight I'm eating dinner with Daphna and Cathy Middleton, Moly and Simeon. I think it will be an enjoyable experience. So, ho ho ho.

I'm sorry I don't have more to say right now. I'm excited about the future. We'll see what happens.

A day in the life of me

Since Alicia asked so nicely, at the risk of boring you all, I will give you a day in my life. What shall I pick? Monday, Wednesday? Perhaps Friday? Well, how about we randomly pick Wednesday.

I get up at 8 AM. There is actually a little devotional get together thing at 7:45 for those who are so inclined and it lasts half an hour, but I'm afraid I don't usually get out of bed for that. Anyway, people usually converge on the kitchen after that for breakfast. Everyone pretty much gets their own - cereal, toast - it's a pretty quick affair. About 15 minutes. Work starts officially at 8:30. On Wednesdays, I work all morning in the garden with Sarah. This morning we were clearing out nasty plants, weeding, and cultivating the many beds around here. It was wet and a little chilly. At 9:50, we have "drinks." The kitchen puts on a pot a tea and everyone again gathers together for about fifteen to twenty minutes just for a respite. For me, it's then back out to the garden. For the last bit of the morning we were cleaning a greenhouse so as to stop algae growth. I go home about 12:10 PM to get changed for lunch. Lunch is at 12:30, a sort of buffet style affair, and fairly informal. Everyone does dishes in the kitchen. We usually have about 20 minutes to do whatever after that - check email, play the piano, in my case. At 1:30, the gears start grinding again. Wednesday afternoons I have time alloted to studying as I am doing some self-guided courses in electronics and computer programming as well as doing some calculus review. 3:30 brings drinks again, until about 3:35. After that, I work in the Microlit office, or wherever I can find some workspace, trying to see the Little Doctor data logger. Work ends at five, and dinner is at 6 PM. Dinner is more put together, with a bit of a chart for where people will sit. Again dishes, and then Wednesday evenings are free. I usually play the piano, the violin, or get online to chat or blog. I usually go to bed around 10:30 or 11 PM. And that's it. Some days are variations on the theme, but you get the general idea.

I hope that satisfies your curiosity, dear. I think you'd like it.

On another note, the house is empty tonight. People here, there and everywhere. Oh well, I hope someone is online later. Love you all, keep in touch.

I feel as though I should comment

Well, with all the turmoil going on in what was until recently my home, I feel as though I should at least attempt to say something.

I was really sad when I learned the Tom Blohm had died. He was such fun to live with. I remember we'd cajole him into playing cribbage with us, Janelle and I would. He was always very competitive about it, begrudging us every win. He was a very encouraging person to be around. I loved him a lot, and even though I hadn't seen him in a few months, I'll still miss him.

Amazing about the Diases, really. Talk about an answer to prayer.

And of course the dear Ekstrom family. I don't really know all the circumstances surrounding them leaving. I know they'll be missed. Wow. What else can you say to something like that? They looked out for me the first year that I was there at Whitestone, and I really got to love them. Wasn't so close to them in later years, but still... And of course, Cara used to be one of my best friends. I wish them well, I guess.

I think that's all I have to say about that. Sayonara.

Little Doctoring

Hey, is anyone out there interested in an inexpensive and small data logger? Most data loggers you'll find can cost hundreds, if not thousands of dollars, and this small logger is available from Microlite Electronics for €79.99 + VAT including software and necessary cables. As the new sales rep, I'd really like to make some sales. So if anyone is interested, let me know. Just leave a comment here. It's the neatest little thing and you can do all sorts of things with it. Look at the website for the Little Doctor. Try it, you'll like it.

I just had to put that in here. Hey, you never know. I would buy it, if I was still in school. Maybe next year. Anyway, I'm just working on Little Doctor stuff right now. Unfortunately, the computer to which I need access to really accomplish anything is being used by someone else, so I'm at a bit of a loose end right now. I don't really care, though.

Well, perhaps more later, but that's it for now.

Doing fine

Well, I slept this afternoon and that was really nice. I played my violin in service this morning and everyone just loved it :)

Anyway, I don't really have anything else to report. Life is much the same as usual.

Gosh, sorry, I wish I had more to say. Just write me emails, k?

And so on...

I had a good talk with my parents last night. I mean, aside from the runny nose and flowing tears. Right. But you know, it helped me see what I really want to get from my time here, no matter how long I am here. Honestly, I had a lot of good reasons for coming here, and I know that I don't want to miss out on whatever God wants me to get out of being here. Truly, I don't. That is uber impotant to me. That doesn't mean that I feel hunky dory. In fact I was making stuff in the kitchen this morning and Nora W. was there and she asked me what was wrong because she could tell I wasn't fine, and I broke down all over again and was really honest with her about how I was feeling and such. She was really nice about it and very encouraging.

I was asking my dad last night how I can stop doing things based entirely on emotions. I know that I have that tendency - I'm not stupid, you know. I mean, to be honest, almost every decision I make is based on how I feel. That doesn't mean that God can't use it, and often things I want to do are what God wants me to do, and that's great. Like going to Whitestone - God was definitely in that, but I also really wanted to go. I think the same thing about coming here to Ireland. I think I was riding on some pretty high emotions from having fun here this summer, and so I wanted to come back, and God said, ok, I can work with that. However, the emotions were wearing off before I even left the States. So, now I'm left in a place that I was brought to a little by emotions, and my gut feeling is to want to leave, also based on emotions. Anyway, my dad said I needed to find a plan of attack for my life, something that really requires me to stick it out, and just do it. Do something logical, not that logic is the highest, but it helps if you're trying to combat emotions. So I'm working on that. The best plan, the most practical one, would require me to be in Illinois by mid-December. We'll see.

So, eventually, one day, I'll figure it all out. I'll get a hold of myself. Maybe. Hahaha.

Oh, and Janelle, of course I still love you. Always will.

I miss home

I have refrained from saying this too outrightly on this blog, but honestly, I really want to go home. I've been here a week and a half and I'm already not sure how I will make it. People keep telling me to just hang in there and it will be so great and don't think of myself, blah blah blah, and not to belittle those encouragements... but I just don't know if I can make it. I really, really don't. I hate to be a wimp. I don't want people to think I'm a failure and that I don't keep commitments, I just don't know if I can really take this. I don't know why it's hitting me so hard, but it is. Will someone tell me what to do!!!!??? I know, it's like, grow up, Boj. How do I deal with this? I really, really want to go home. It would be one thing if I was going to be here for a month, but six? Seven? I just can't do it. I'm sorry, but I really don't think I can. HELP!!!!!!

An interesting thought

I wonder what happens to all those people who stop blogging? Why do they stop? Did they just forget they had a blog? Did they swear off the internet forever? Sometimes I peruse blogs of people with like interests, and a lot of them have last posts from a year ago. What happened? I just get so curious. But then again, Josiah doesn't blog anymore, and that's just because he doesn't. That's so silly. Oh well. No big deal.

For Nika

Yes, you are right, I did get an email from you and that counts for SO much. However, I had already written that post when I got it, and, proportional to the amount of emails I sent out, one is but a drop in the bucket. NEVERTHELESS, it is duly appreciated. I should also say that I have since had another one, from Nate, thank you. Gotta go!

Here I am, running as fast as I can

That's a song, just in case you didn't know that. So, today was pretty good. I have now been here one week. So, yay and all that. I've been writing emails to the outside world, but not a lot of feedback. Come on people, write me!

I've discovered that I miss having a roommate. Rather, I should say that the pros seem to outweigh the cons of having one. That's just what I've decided. I mean, I go home at night, and I'm all alone in my room, and that's kind of lonely. No one to talk to, no comforting presence across the way. I felt that way even before I came here to Ireland - even at my parents I thought that. Well, anyway, enough of that.

I would die for an espresso drink right now. Like a mocha. A mocha breve. Mmmmm! Yummy.

So, did I tell you about the cool book I'm reading? It's called The Elegant Universe, by Brian Greene. He's a physics professor, currently based at... Columbia University, I think? Anyway, it's about how superstring theory unites the discrepencies between quantum mechanices and relativity. It sounds daunting, but it's actually pretty good. And then he's got another one out called The Fabric of the Cosmos. I'm sure thats good, too. So... that's what keeps me occupied these days. In the words of Rascal Flatts, "Yeah, that's what I'm doing these days."

So, cool.

More from the heart of Boj

Posting, shmosting. You know, I think that if I didn't have the outlet of blogging as a form of contact with the outside world, I might, just might, go crazy. But it's okay.

So, today I cleaned and worked and ate lunch and weeded and so on. It was fine. That's all I have to say. Sorry.

Satiated

Interesting word, eh?

Well, yesterday I got very homesick and I missed my parents. Are you still allowed to do that when you've not been living with your parents for five years and you're almost 21? Ah well, I don't care anyway. Suffice it to say that I did. It was very sad and I cried. But I feel better now. So it's okay.

Anyway, this afternoon I'm just hanging out doing not much of anything. Blogging, obviously. Um, I started my electronics pseudo-class. It's interesting, a little. I know it will be useful. I mean, I couldn't even define voltage and current, so I guess it's good to have some more knowledge than that. Tonight we're having a dinner for Jon R. who just had a birthday. I'm sure that will be enjoyable.

I wish I had more to say, but I don't really. Oh well.